Sunday, August 17, 2008

Mommy Guilt

I was feeling pretty crappy when I went to bed last night, and chalked it up to the stressful shopping outing. But when I woke up this morning I still felt bad - tired and achey. I went to church (and was so glad I did because it was a powerful, moving, tears-streaming-down-my-face, worship experience!) but by the time we got home I felt like I had the flu. I had chills, was achey all over - even my butt cheeks ached - and just felt exhausted. So as soon as we got home I put my jammies back on and got back in bed. I slept most of the afternoon - Hubby woke me up in time to go to our Small Group meeting (again, so glad I went because we have an awesome Small Group and had a great lesson/discussion tonight). We grabbed the kids up after Group and tried a new Chinese restaurant in town, and now that we're home I'm still feeling like ca-ca.

But what's worse than my physical symptoms? The Mommy Guilt.

I don't want my children to think that I am tired or don't feel well all the time. I hate that I was not there for them today (altho Hubby was, so it's not like they were orphaned for the day or anything!). I don't want them to think I'm a lazy, deadbeat mom because I stayed in bed all afternoon. Sometimes I just get so tired, tho. And sometimes, like today, I just flat-out don't feel well. Maybe I should be stronger. Maybe I should push thru the fatigue and weariness and put on a happy face for them. I want to be the best mom I can be for them. I want them to think I am the greatest mom on the planet. I wasn't that mom today.

11 comments:

Kristi said...

I had a bad case of mommy guilt last night as well. We were busy with house repairs all weekend (and a little bout with PMS) and I yelled at him when he did some naughty things. I me, REALLY SCREAMED. I felt so bad last night, I cried. We talked about the situation and even prayed together for forgiveness, but I still felt terrible about it.

cjh said...

You're a great mom. One day of literally sick and tired does not a bad mom make. And you're teaching them that it's ok to take care of yourself and have an off day every once in awhile. If you were Super Mom 24/7, I think it would be a pretty high standard (for you and them) to live up to. And you gave them some great Daddy bonding time.

D... said...

Knock that ca-ca off! Seriously! If you don't feel well, you don't feel well. Why push through the fatigue when you know if you do, you still aren't going to have the day you want? And then run the risk of not feeling well even longer.

You are a great mom. You have great kids. They love you just the way you are! And every single day they think you are the greatest mom on the planet. You are THEIR mom. They are old enough now that they do their own things anyway. Besides, they really needed that day with their daddy.

So, seriously, stop with the guilt. It's unnecessary.

Now, how are you feeling today?

Jennie said...

No Guilt. You do the best you can and know that's enough. You can't take care of them if you don't take care of you!

Pleasing Procrasinator said...

I 2nd what Jenni said. Kids know if your not well and the best you can do for yourself and them is getting better so can be the best mommy possible:)

Tales From the Eurovan said...

Even supermoms need a day to rest and re-group and not feel guilty about it, it's what makes us better moms. I'm sure your kids would rather have you take one full day to feel better than to just drag through the week feeling bad, which then just brings on more guilt. Take care, Julie

Katie Lady said...

Um, you aren't super-mom? There went my role-model. I'm a bit disappointed.

(Note the sarcasm)

Honey, this is just another lesson for your kids. If they want to drag you all over the place the day before, then they have to know that Mommy needs a L-O-N-G nap!

In my case, after a day of a whining Drew-Bear, Mommy needs a COCKTAIL! And I don't feel guilty about it ONE BIT. You are, after all, only human. And they love you the more for it.

amy said...

hope you feel better soon!

Bubba's Mom said...

Try margaritas. That's what I do, but then, I don't have to feel guilty anymore - my kids are all grown up!!!

crazy working mom said...

Don't sweat it. You're awesome and they know it. We all have those "off" days. Just don't be too hard on yourself. :)

david mcmahon said...

Everyone has those days. Just revel in your family and their love and support.