Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Kids Are So Funny!

Children Writing About The Ocean...

1) - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6)
2) - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)
3) - If you are surrounded by ocean you are an island. If you don't have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. ( Wayne, age 7)
4) - Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend any more. (Kylie, age 6)
5) - A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy, age 8)
6) - My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and pots and comes back with crabs. (Millie, age 6)
7) - When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would have been better off eating beans. (William, age 7 )
8) - Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful and I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get pregnant? Like, really? (Helen, age 6)
9) - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is always crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age 6)
10) - Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher, age 7)
11) - When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small. (Kevin, age 6)
12) - Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky, age 8)
13) - On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water fired right up her big fat ass. (Julie, age 7)
14) - The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don't drown I don't know. (Bobby, age 6)
15) - My dad was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean. What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom. (James, age 7)


cjh said...

Is that DrewBear?

And those are quite entertaining.

Bubba's Sis said...

That's Drew Bear!

Katie Lady said...


Yes, that's my sweet munchkin. Before the waves got too high over his feet and he didn't like it anymore.

jennyonthespot said...

Oh, those little things are the most cutest, most funniest things ever! My favorite one is #4.


Jenny 865-53oh9 said...

OMG...those were hilarious! Ok, so #9 was kinda sad, but a few snuck up on me and I was snorting!

Well Behaved Krissy said...

If you'd like me to fix you some octopus testicles on the top of your head for going out this weekend I will :)

Bubba's Mom said...

I want that picture of Drew Bear!!

Big Hair Envy said...

I know I will be thinking about those quotes when we hit the beach this summer!! hahahaha!