I've done it again.

I don't know why I punish myself like this. But I do. While my house is on the market, I look at other houses that I want to buy - you know, so I won't be homeless when my house DOES sell. However, what happens is I find a house I love, only to have it bought out from under me before I can sell mine. It has happened three times. It is very frustrating. You'd think I'd learn. But no - today I went and looked at another house. And I'm in love with it. It is SUCH a great house! I could move right in and not have to change a thing! It's a great location, great size, great layout, great schools for the kids - basically, it's perfect. But because it is perfect, I know it will sell fast, and I do not have an offer on my very-nice-house-that-I'm-only-selling-because-we-want-to-downsize-and-live-closer-to-my-parents. I'm probably going to watch House #4 slip away like the others..........wah!

So, anyone out there wanna buy a house?????

**UPDATE - Sunday night - just as I predicted, it went fast. I checked on it tonight and it has a contract on it. Dammit. That's it. I'm not looking at ANY MORE HOUSES until I sell this one!

Transition

I know exactly where I was 13 years ago right now. I was at the hospital, getting an epidural (I distinctly remember telling the anesthesiologist that I loved him). Two hours later - at 1:16 a.m. on March 22, 1994 - my daughter was born. My first born. She was absolutely beautiful and perfect. She was born 1 week early, and she weighed 5 pounds and 13 ounces. She was a tiny thing. The most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I was in love.

That tiny little bundle of joy will be 13 years old in just a couple of hours. She will wake up in the morning a teenager. I can hardly believe it - where has the time gone? How could she have grown up so fast? Sometimes I just want to yell, "Wait! Wait! It's going too fast!" I want to slow life down and enjoy the beautiful moments more........the moments when my children were babies with curly blond hair and big blue eyes and toothless smiles that would melt your heart........the funny baby things they said and did.........even the middle-of-the-night feedings, when it was just the two of us in the darkness, bonding in love. Sometimes I'll tell Beautiful Daughter, "Can't you go back and be a baby again?" and she says to me, "Mom! I gotta live!" Yes. She's got to live. And I pray that it is a blessed life. She is entering into a difficult time in life......but also a time of fun and opportunity.......from here she steps into adulthood. I hope I am doing my job well. So far so good - I couldn't ask for a better daughter. She is still absolutely beautiful and perfect.

Happy Birthday, baby girl. I love you!

Dancing With the Amazing Idol Survivor (or, How I Became a Prime Time Couch Potato)

This is nothing to be proud of. Surely I have better things to do with my time than watch reality TV five nights a week. But I can't help it! I'm addicted! It just so happens that all my favorite shows are on at the same time right now. This makes for a busy week of TV watching. Thank goodness I have the DVR in case something really important comes up!

My week begins with Amazing Race on Sunday night. I missed the very first season of this show, but have been hooked ever since Season 2! This season is an "All Star" season; I pretty much like all of the teams, except Charla & Myrna. They have GOT to go! I'm rooting for the Beauty Queens, Dustin and Kandice.

On Monday nights it's Dancing With the Stars! I love love LOVE this show (probably because I love dancing so much)! Last season I was ga-ga over Mario and Emmitt. This season my early favorite is Joey Fatone, altho there were others that I thought did very well, too. We'll see how the season plays out - it has only just begun.

On Tuesdays it's American Idol! This is another one I have watched since Season 2 (where was I during Season 1???). I don't really have any favorites yet this season, but I think Sanjaya has outworn his welcome, and I think Melinda will win it all. Just my early opinion. There are several I like on there.

Tuesday nights will also be the results show for DWTS. I will likely DVR this and fast-forward thru the boring parts to the end when the announcement of who's going home is made.

Wednesday nights are Idol's results show. This is another good one to DVR and then skip to the end. No need to listen to 30 minutes of blah blah blah when all I want to know is a) who are the Bottom Three, and 2) who is going home.

Thursdays bring Survivor! I have watched this one from the beginning, and I still love it in its 14th season. This season has gotten off to a slow start for me, but it looks like they are going to mix things up this week, so it should get better. No favorites on this one so far for me, either, but there are a few I certainly dislike!

With all this going on, I barely have time for my other TV addictions......Lost and Desperate Housewives, to name a couple. Like I said, good thing I have that DVR!

Hello. My name is Bubba's Sis and I am a Prime Time Couch Potato.

To sleep, perchance to dream....

When I sleep, I dream. Vivid, sometimes crazy dreams that I can remember clearly, sometimes for years afterwards (like the one where I was going on a date with Vince Gill and we went ice skating and he had a pet monkey....). I even dream when I nap. I have recurring dreams and random dreams. Perhaps I shall post my dreams on this blog sometimes, both for your amusement and so maybe you psychotherapist-type readers can help me figure out what they mean!!!

But that's for another day.

There are some nights, like last night, when I don't sleep. I don't know why. Sometimes I don't sleep at all - just lightly doze here and there for 5-10 minutes at a time, then lie awake the rest of the time. Some nights I lie awake for hours, songs and thoughts whirling in my head, playing like a movie on the back of my eyelids, until I finally fall asleep just in time to be good and asleep when it's time to get up. Because I haven't done a good list here in a while, I figured this would be a good one -

Ten Things I Think About When I Can't Sleep

1. Things I need to do the next day
2. My next vacation
3. How I will arrange my furniture and things in the new house I want
4. Impacted ear wax (I think I have that right now and I'm somewhat concerned)
5. Whether the people I interact with on a regular basis really like me or are just pretending to
6. What I would do with the money if I won the lottery
7. What I would name another child if I were to miraculously have one
8. Hurtful things that have happened in the past, and why some of them I can let go of and others still kinda piss me off
9. Things to blog about
10. What time I have to get up and how little sleep I am getting.

Of course, there are a million other things that go thru my mind on nights like these, and they are always set to music. I'll get songs in my head that I have no idea how they got in there. I'm weird that way.

So what do you do when you can't sleep? Besides READ, which everyone tells me to do. Sometimes that works for me, sometimes it doesn't. What stuff do you think about?

Sad Sign of the Times

I know what fear is. All my life I have been afraid of things - some irrational, some not - but I know that feeling in the pit of your stomach, that pounding heart, that overwhelming sense of dread. But never in my life did I feel fear at school (except for a tornado drill in 2nd grade that freaked me out a little). I never felt unsafe at school, never worried that I would be harmed or, worse, killed.

Times are different now.

Yesterday Darling Daughter (who is in 7th grade) was absolutely terrified to go to school. It seems that rumors started swirling on Wednesday that gang members would come into the school on Thursday and shoot anyone that was wearing red or blue. EVERYONE was talking about it. The teachers had called a faculty meeting about it. The school officer was on high alert (we didn't even have a school officer when I was in school!).

My first thought was, "Well, just don't wear red or blue tomorrow!", but looking into her tear-filled eyes, I knew that this was very real to her. She was truly afraid.

Of course this was real to her. She has grown up hearing tales of Columbine and other school-shootings; along with tornado drills and fire drills, the schools now also have lock-down drills. More than once has an area school been sent into lock-down for various reasons. When Navy Son was in high school they went into lock-down for hours because of some shooting or knifing threat. She knows that these things do happen, and they can happen here in our suburbian bubble just as well as they can happen in the inner city. My daughter did not want to die at school.

After a phone call to the school I was assured by both the counselor and the principal that they were, indeed, aware of the rumors and they were just that: rumors. Nonetheless, the school security was prevalent on Thursday, and there were no incidents. Darling Daughter did not wear red or blue anyway, just in case. She was nervous all day. My heart ached for her.

No child should have to be afraid at school; no child should have to worry that they will be gunned down for wearing the wrong colors. What kind of society have we created??

Diagnosis

Got in to see my doctor today - after 4 days without a voice, the diagnosis was confirmed: I have laryngitis. I also have bronchitis. So now I'm on an antibiotic and some wicked cough syrup that makes me feel way drunk and sleepy. But I don't seem to be coughing as much, so that's good. Give me a few days and I'll be back to my good ol' self, voice and all.

In the meantime, I must sleep........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

My Happy Place

Just got home from spending a wonderful week in my Happy Place - Disney World. Yes, I know we go there a lot. This was Hubby's and my 6th trip; it was the kids' 5th. We love it there. Even after that many trips, we still did things we had never done before - rode new rides, saw new characters, ate at new restaurants, stayed at a new resort - every trip we take there is different. And every one is magical.

I came home sick this time - it hit me on our last day there - sore throat, bad cough, and no voice. I suspect I have strep throat, but maybe not. Definitely laryngitis. Maybe pneumonia for all I know. We got home at about 10:00 Friday night, so I can't see my doctor until Monday. I'm managing to suffer thru the weekend so far.

Welcome back to real life.

Movie Review

I don't go to the movies very much. It's not that I don't enjoy movies - I just don't usually enjoy the movie theater experience. The prices are too high, the people are annoying....I'd much rather watch from the comfort of my own couch. HOWEVER, I am occasionally persuaded to take in a movie on the big screen. This weekend it was Music and Lyrics, with Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore.

I thought this was a great movie! Granted, it is a "chick flick" (altho Hubby enjoyed it, too - I caught him laughing several times!). But it was a good story, funny, and had great music. Anyone who remembers the 80's will get a kick out of how well the music of that time is portrayed. The video is hilarious, and I've been watching it on YouTube several times today! I definitely recommend this movie - and I think I'll even buy the soundtrack.

And now that Hubby has seen Music and Lyrics with me, he wants me to go see Ghost Rider with him. Ugh.

Things I'm Sick of Hearing About

Things I Can't Get Enough Of!

I Wanna Be a Bear

I don't know who authored this, but I like it! Because the Winter Doldrums have got me down....

In My Next Life, I Want to Be a Bear

In my next life, I want to be a bear.
If you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months.
I could deal with that.
Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that, too.
If you're a bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute cuddly cubs.
I could definitely deal with that.
If you're a Mama Bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.
I could deal with that.
If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat. He KNOWS not to get between you and the food.

Yup..... Gonna be a bear.

He's here!!!

Take a look at my new nephew!!! Isn't he beautiful?!? Bubba and Katie Lady welcomed Baby Drew into the world today at 5:19 p.m. EST (which was 4:19 p.m. here in Texas). He weighs 8 pounds and 5 ounces - a big boy! I'm so proud and I can't wait to see him in person!!

There she is....

Congratulations to Miss Oklahoma Lauren Nelson, who tonight was crowned Miss America 2007! The Miss America Party at my house was smaller than usual this year, partly because the pageant was on Monday night (how crazy is that?!?). The usual attendees include myself, Bubba's Mom, Katie Lady, Wendy Bird, and my best friend Dana Lou. Wendy Bird couldn't make it down from Fort Worth this year, and of course Katie Lady couldn't come all the way from NYC with a baby about to be born any day now!! But we did have a good time, eating brownies and critiquing the contestants; and one of our favorites did win this year! So we put the crowns away until July, when we will get them out again for the Miss Texas pageant. Hopefully the whole gang will be back together again for that one! Until then we will all keep wishing for World Peace....

Normal? It's all relative....

Recently took a "How Normal Are You?" quiz that I found on cjh's blog - here are my results:

You Are 40% Normal

While some of your behavior is quite normal... Other things you do are downright strange You've got a little of your freak going on But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

How Normal Are You?

Bubba and Katie Lady also took the quiz, and they too are 40% normal! And Cousin Wendy Bird - 40% normal. So it must be a family thing.

I am surprised that my normalcy is only at 40% - I always thought *I* was the normal one, and everyone else was weird! It certainly seems that way. But I can see a few things I do that people may construe as weird...

For instance, I like even numbers. The volume on the TV should always be an even number. Or a multiple of 5 - that is OK, too. Also, if I'm walking up stairs I must take the first step with my right foot. And the right sock must go one first, then the left sock, then the right shoe, then the left shoe. If you go sock-shoe, sock-shoe, it's just not right (Bubba will back me up on that one!). I'm a very organized person, to the point where some think I could have a bit of OCD - but that's not weird. That's just organized. I like to do certain things in a certain order. I like things to be in their place.

Doesn't everyone have their little idiosyncrasies? Does that make us not "normal"? I didn't understand how some of the questions in the quiz determined if I'm normal or not - like is it ok for someone else to be in the room when you use the bathroom. Any married couple has done this. It's a necessity. Not weird. And have I smoked pot? I have not. Is that normal? I have no idea. Bubba, have you smoked pot???

Well, all quizzing aside, I still see myself as a pretty normal gal. And if you don't agree - well, you're weird.

Clean Slate

My favorite part of New Years is starting a new calendar. It's like a clean slate - open to all the possibilites of things I will do throughout the next year. At the end of the year I can look back on it and remember the story of my life for the past 365 days. All written out neatly in blue ink. All the birthdays and anniversaries checked off, the list of books I read and movies I watched, the appointments kept and parties attended. The weddings and the funerals. The good and the bad. It's all there.

One would think I would have my resolutions in there - my list of things to do better - or at least differently - for the New Year. This year I'm not making resolutions. Because who are we kidding? I'm not going to keep them anyway. Things I should resolve to do? Cook better meals for my family and not eat out so much, save more money, read more books. Might happen. Might not. Either way, I'll be OK. Why put pressure on myself by making it an official resolution?

I do have some goals for 2007. I want to move out of this house. Hopefully soon. It will be an improvement to all areas of our lives. I want to go on the vacation we had to give up when Hubby broke his leg. We have that tentatively re-scheduled, but we will see. I want to become stronger in my faith and truly trust God enough to not worry about things. I guess those kinda sound like resolutions, but they're not exactly. Just things I want for myself and my family. Things to improve our lives and make us happy. We need happy. Because we've dealt with a lot of crap lately. I can prove it - it's all written in last year's calendar.

Kudos!

CONGRATULATIONS to Navy Son, who has been accepted at the Naval Academy Prep School! He will go there from August 2007 to May 2008, then beginning in August 2008, do four years at the U.S. Naval Academy in Annapolis! We are so proud!

The Best Gift

Well, Christmas is over for another year. Without a doubt, the Best Gift Ever is the gift of Jesus Christ - He is perfect, and no amount of Bah! Humbug! or Scrooginess can change the beauty of celebrating His birth. Despite my less-than-cheery attitude this season, the true meaning of Christmas did not escape me, and it moved me to tears as I held my candle and sang Silent Night in church on Christmas Eve.

But my Best Gift This Year came from Bubba and Katie, who searched high and wide to find me just what I wanted.....

Bah! Humbug!

I have tried really hard to be in the "Christmas Spirit" this year. Really, I have. I've been listening to Christmas music on the radio, attending parties, going to church (well, I always go to church, but I'm trying to reinforce the TRUE meaning of Christmas). Just when I think things are starting to look up and I feel a little bit cheery - BOOM! Life kicks me in the butt again and I'm back to being Scrooge.

One of my holiday pet peeves is those Christmas family newsletters that people send out with their Christmas cards. For one thing, if we are really that close, I already know all the stuff that you've been doing over the past year, and may have even done some of it with you. And if I don't know all that stuff - then why the hell are you sending me a Christmas card when you don't even care about keeping in touch with me for the past year? Usually these family newsletters serve simply as "brag letters" - boasting of the wonderful vacations their family went on this year, how Junior is making straight A's in school and playing on the All Star baseball/soccer/football team, how great a promotion Mr. Husband got this year (including a hefty raise), yadda yadda yadda. Puke. Here's my version of our family's newsletter for this Christmas:

Well, 2006 started out pretty good for us - we managed a great trip to Disney for Spring Break and even brought Bubba's Mom with us. Things seemed to be going swimmingly - and then reality hit. Since summer Hubby and I have both lost grandparents, and Hubby's boss died suddenly of a stroke. We had a rather major and hurtful feud with Hubby's family. Hubby broke his leg in two places and had to have surgery, and we also discovered that his blood pressure was so high that HE very easily could have stroked out himself. His recovery has been hellish, and altho now he has finally been given the all-clear, there were 54 days of incapacity for him, which dumped quite a burden on me. He missed a whole month of work. Did I mention he is paid solely on commission? Yeah. A month without a paycheck is rough. All that pretty much blew our holiday vacation plans away. We're also trying to sell our house because our neighbors are drug-dealing gangsta wanna-be's; today one of them drove their car all the way across our yard, from their driveway to ours, coming dangerously close to our bedroom windows along the way. Had to speak with the cops - again - about that one. You know it's a bad sign when all of the town's police officers know your neighbor by his first name. The refrigerator died today - it's only 3 years old, so we're not sure what's up with it, but everything in it is melting and it's leaking all over the kitchen floor. I'm tired, I'm broke, and I'm frustrated. Bah! Humbug!

Robot Boy

Little Son did a very cool thing today - it was his first Robotics Team Competition. Being in 4th grade, this is his first year to be eligible to participate, and his division is called FIRST Lego League - the robots are built from Legos, but have computers for brains. Computers these kids have to program in order for the robot to complete its "tasks" for the competition (no remote-controlled robots here). I must admit, I was not looking forward to spending the entire day at the University of Houston watching a robotics competition, but I was pleasantly surprised at how interesting the whole thing was, and I was so very proud of Little Son for being smart enough to even do all that stuff! His team was mostly first-timers, but they did ALL the work on their robot, from building it to programming it, and managed to come in 16th out of 20 teams in their division. That's not last place. And Little Son got a medal for being one of the two kids on the "floor" running the robot during the competition. He's already excited to go back and do it again next year!

Double Standard?

Danny DeVito was on The View Wednesday, apparently "drunk as a skunk" (Joy Behar's words). He told a long, drawn out story about having sex with his wife in the Lincoln Bedroom at the White House, and also made several off-color remarks about President George Bush, some of which had to be "bleeped out". But according to an AP report, everyone is laughing it off. Co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck even said, "But he was a fun drunk!"

So why is this OK?

The comments that Mel Gibson made while drunk - off-color comments about Jews - have all but ruined him. The media tore him up. Why is it OK to make rude comments about the President while drunk, but not about Jewish people? I don't condone rude comments about either Jews or the President, but why is one so much more forgivable than the other?